All Dads need a thermometer for checking up on their children’s various illnesses, so why not make it a Dadget thermometer? Admittedly, I am quite drawn to using an old-fashioned mercury thermometer – there’s something about the threat of a rectal temperature reading that keeps kids from feigning illness – but a modern father needs a modern thermometer.

Mothercare Forehead Thermometer (£3.99 from Mothercare)

Cheap, cheerful, and completely impractical is this offering from Mothercare. It is a heat sensitive strip that you press against your child’s forehead like a crazed gunman for about 7 hours before it finally changes colour to indicate the appropriate temperature. If you’ve ever tried using this on a real-life, wriggling, screaming baby then you’ll soon realise that your £4 would have been much better spent on some Whisky miniatures.

Braun Thermoscan 4520 (£29.34 from Amazon.co.uk)

This is more like it. The Braun Thermoscan is digital, it takes temperatures within only a few seconds, and is the tool of choice for doctors which is reassuring. My only gripe with the Braun is that it uses single-use covers for the ear sensor. I’m all for hygiene, but the hassle and expense of buying disposable covers for the rest of my life just seems like a bit of a ball ache. So while it might be the natural choice for doctors, it ain’t mine.

Brother Max 3-in-1 Thermometer
(£35 from JoJo Maman Bebe)

The Brother Max has it all – a digital display, the ability to read temperatures from forehead or ear, a room temperature option, and a neat plastic travel case. Furthermore, it doesn’t require any disposable covers. The perfect thermometer then? Find out in my full review in a few weeks.

Way back when I educated you about the Slingbox and how it was a boon for kids to watch their favourite TV when away from home (and for Daddy to watch Sky Sports when away on business). I was most excited to see an iPhone application for the Slingbox that finally gave me the opportunity to watch Sky Sports Super Sunday whilst sat outside the women’s changing room at Next or the feeding room at Mothercare.

Imagine my dismay, then, when not only did the iPhone application recently appear at the extortionate price of £17.99, but it also only works on Wi-Fi and not 3G! So when I am at home with full access to my large screen TV, I can use my home Wi-Fi connection to stream TV to my little iPhone screen. However, when I am out at the weekend shopping for women’s clothes and Henry’s anal cream the iPhone app is no good to me whatsoever! Shame on SlingMedia for allowing Apple and/or the mobile networks to render their application completely useless.

We’ve all been there. You’re in the middle of something highly important, like browsing for hairy armpit fetish pornography, and then your baby monitor shrieks out a weird wailing sound. Your wife looks at you from the kitchen sink and gives you a flick of the head as if to say, “Go upstairs to see if he’s alright. And no, I’m never growing my armpit hair.” If only you had a video baby monitor.

Summer Baby’s Quiet Sounds Video Monitor
(£84.99 from Mothercare)

Yes this is (relatively) cheap, but the camera is only black and white and the monitor is an old-fashioned CRT. Man has walked on the moon, the Berlin wall has fallen, Dr Who is on his 11^th incarnation, and we now have colour cameras and LCD screens. This is an embarrassment of a baby monitor that only a time-warped hermit should consider buying.

Safety 1st High Clarity Colour Digital Video Monitor
(£149.99 from Kiddicare)

Now this is more like it. A full colour baby monitor with a hand-held colour LCD screen receiver. The camera also has infrared LEDs that invisibly light up your baby’s nursery during the night and allow you a clear view of him straining out his midnight poo. My only gripes are that the screen is pretty tiny and you can’t hook the camera up to the Internet. Why would you want to do that? Well…

Y-Cam Knight Wireless IP Security Camera
(£154.99 from CMaC)

Be aroused. Be very aroused. This is the video monitor of your dreams. Primarily sold for CCTV applications, this is the kind of high tech dadgetary you may not have realised that you needed, but you soon will.

The Y-Cam Knight is a standalone colour camera, with infrared night vision, that connects to your home wireless network to allow you to view the camera from your laptop. Did I also mention that you can view it from your iPhone? Did I also mention that grandparents can securely log in and view it over the Internet? Did I also mention that you can move it to your hairy-armpitted Swedish au-pair’s bedroom when your baby has grown up?

Needless to say, I’ve bought one of these fine fellows from the good people at CMaC and I’ll provide a full review here shortly. (Full review now here)